NO SHOW TILL AUGUST 25th
Some of you already know but my mother died this past May. As with my father it was a “good death,” free from pain or fear. She had been ailing for a year and she was ready to depart this plane of existence. As a Buddhist of over 45 years’ duration, she looked at death as one more “what is this?” experience. In the words of Suzuki Roshi, the founder of Beginner’s Mind Temple, cultivating the mindset of the eternal beginner was the key to spiritual growth.
If you’re interested, there is a book with of her talks, lectures and speeches, “Seeds For A Boundless Life,” by Zenkei Blanche Hartman.
She was a badass and I’m glad she was my mother. Like her I strive to live a life of service to others. My area is sex while hers was Zen meditation, but we share that. I’m not sad as it followed the natural order of things and there was nothing left unsaid.
As someone said on the memorial page, “I see her and Lou (my Dad) sitting together again on some mountainside.” While I don’t believe in an afterlife (or rebirth for that matter), it’s a nice notion and I’ll keep it.
Propositon 60 VOTE NO!!
For those of you reading this who are registered to vote in California, please vote NO on Prop 60, the “condoms in porn” ballot initiative. You can read all about it, and why to vote against it, here. In short, it’s dangerous to performers and puts them in line to be sued by consumers if there is no visible condom in the scene, even if the performers are real-life couples doing a cam show out of their bedroom. Egregious and unnecessary.
WOODHULL’S 7th SEXUAL FREEDOM SUMMIT
I just returned from a trip to DC, where I was attending the Woodhull Freedom Foundation ‘s Sexual Freedom Summit. Now in its seventh year it’s a four-day event filled with workshops, panel discussions, parties and social intercourse devoted to the notion that sexual freedom is a fundamental human right. If you look around the site you’ll see what kinds of things were on the agenda. It was really nice this year that we had a men’s sexual health track and several sessions on decolonizing sex positivity. Plus classes on lube, what makes a family, sex workers rights, disability and sexuality, and more.
There were vendors selling toys, such as The Pleasure Chest, NJoyToys, as well as the bookseller, Red Emma’s, which has a great selection of sex/Queer/Gay/Sex Worker positive books on sale. Highly recommended if you have any gaps in your sex library.
The list of sponsors is amazing. Some of them: Tantus, Sliquid, SportSheets, She Vibe, Doxy, Chaturbate, Sex Positive World, Smitten Kitten, Free Speech Coalition, and more. Each night there was a themed party and the awarding to four worthy recipients of The Vicky, named for Victoria Woodhull an early feminist whose fundamental ideas are radical today, and she’s been dead nearly a century!
It’s a great weekend, full of laughter, tears, empowerment, cross pollination of ideas, networking, dancing, flirting and more. Burlesque, Bedpost Confessions, awards and a roundtable at Sunday brunch to finish it all off. Worth marking your calendar for, especially if you’re in the sex education/health/advocacy fields.
Each year at the Summit I room with Reid Mihalko, a dear friend and fellow sex geek (a phrase he coined). He’s an excellent educator and a hell of a party host. Our room has had, for the past three years, the best orgy in town! This year’s was no exception. Sixteen people in a two-queen room (truth be told, though, five of them stayed dressed and hung out in front of the bathroom chatting), leaving eleven people to party down. I can’t even begin to say who all was there, but there was a fisting train for the woman whose birthday it was, various couples going full-tilt boogie with each other, awesome pegging between two hotties, spanking of a cute, petite redheaded masochist, a fabulous oral sex train with the boy in the middle of two women.
Lots of laughter, lots of fellatio. One high point came when the cute redhead offered up her partner’s dick for a triple hand job. She, a busty blonde and me did the honors on a dick that could work in porn. Eight solid inches of really pretty dick. I tried to get it all down my throat but I was unable. It was telling, though, that he got a leeeetle harder the more I made myself gag on it. That’s a fun party trick and it’s a thrill when the recipient is down for a little power exchange.
There were four men and seven women at the party. None of the men came during the group action, though I know they certainly did when they got back to their rooms with their partners. However, the women present made up for it. The Birthday Girl pulling the fisting train had about six orgasms, and the Busty Blonde had one, facilitated by me doing the penetration honors while she did the buzzy-on-the-clit honors. The Petite Redhead had at least three and the Brunette had two. Whew!
I helped two women do their first fisting, as Birthday Girl was most accommodating. Her ability to stay in the moment while giving precise instructions to the giver is impressive. With each successive orgasm she needed more clitoral stimulation and soon enough the battery-operated vibrator wasn’t enough. Luckily I never travel without my trusty Magic Wand with the extension cord and she was able to get out one more, with feeling. And puddles, too, as she squirts when she’s very excited.
As these events go, the heavy-duty action lasted about an hour, with five different little mini-parties going on simultaneously. Two hours in, everyone gathered their clothes, hugged a tired good bye and filtered out. That left Reid and his partner who, by chance, had been circling each other for four years at events. They had been making out during the party and when it was just the three of us they started fucking in earnest. That was the perfect time to step into the bathroom and call Ernest to chat about the day and say goodnight. At parties like these, when the fucking ends up face-to-face, it’s time to give them some privacy.
Just when I was finished on the phone with Ernest I heard them finish in the bedroom. I emerged from the bathroom to see her putting on her dress to leave. She shared that, after four years of flirting it felt like prom night and man, had it been a good one!
Reid was asleep in moments and I took a moment to use my Magic Wand. I was excited enough from what I had done and seen that I came in under five minutes and soon, too, was asleep in a happy heap.
Next year: connecting units!
I hope you all have had a safe and wonderful summer.