Relationships…
Yes, you read the title correct.
R-E-L-A-T-I-O-N-S-H-I-P-S
Definition: the way in which two or more concepts, objects, or people are connected, or the state of being connected.
At this point in my life, all I want to do is fall deep in love with the man of my dreams. What’s so wrong with that?
I like to be sappy, adore, and I love to well, love. Why not share memorable moments with someone by my side. The best feeling in the world would be to snuggle up to Romeo and his stubble chin every night. This is no biological-clock-ticking desperate call for someone to answer, and if this was…please don’t answer it. Some might think 23 years old is far too young, while others are already married and expecting their second child. I’m not looking to shack up and pop out a million babies, but if I did, I would name them One, Two, Three, Four…and so on. I’ve only had one real true love affection in all my years ( lol I sound so old ) and that was freshman year. It is hysterical to look back on my first love and wonder what the fuck was I thinking? No offense to him, but I’m pretty sure I can see over him these days in no heels. And if I remember correctly, we got it on once on prom night…I know so cliche…and it didn’t go too silky. That’s all I can say about that one true love without talking smack or being brash. After him there were a series of typical skater boys, which are my weakness. Something about a lazy non-driven ‘boy’ that doesn’t need anything in life but his skateboard and a bottle of booze really steals my heart. It’s got to be from all those skater boys I ditched class with in high school. It wasn’t till I was about 20 years old I started dating Men. Guys older then me. Ahhh, so this is what it feels like to date a man, ahem I mean MAN. No, not really…the man part kind of dilutes after a short time. I’d rather I not get into that subject, and I know I don’t always pick bad seeds but, even the older men who have everything and seem so leveled in life, are still adolescent boys. Eh, maybe I’m just being excessively picky.
By now you have to be asking yourself, ‘How in the world can a PORNSTAR be in a serious relationship?!?’
And that’s just the same damn thing I was justing asking myself.
As some as you may know I was very much involved and had a relationship with this man for the past year. We broke up in July (insert happy smiling face) and it wasn’t until the smoke had cleared for me to notice what him and I had was nothing but a cover. We thought it was a good idea. Filling in the gaps that the other one flawed. Needless to say, I learned my lesson, and it was a damn good lesson. Was it a substantial waste of time for the past year? Yes. Would I do it all over again? No, at least not with the same person. Hey, I am even open to dating women as long as they are in my age group…Back to the topic. Girls in the adult industry aka Pornstars, sluts, whores, can love too! Well, maybe not all…but nonetheless I’ve meet some of the most remarkable mothers, wife’s, sisters, whatever. All of them which have tremendously huge hearts. My role model happens to take her clothes off for a living, big deal. She also sticks full size baseball bats in her anus. Cute huh? But who are you to judge? Women are programmed to either love or fuck you over, Pornstar or not. And I want to love…or do I? Ever feel like I do now? The desire to spend every moment filled with romance or frolic around town like a good whore and share lust…it’s a fine line, especially because of my current career choice.
Since my last love interest, life has never been finer! It’s always better to to come out of a bad situation optimistic and keeping yourself busy. The gym has become my new best friend, boxing and even running. I find myself reading and writing more and actually getting out of my house with real friends. But no matter how many new hobbies and activities I create, I want to spend them with someone I just can’t keep my hands and eyes off of. I just want to fuck everywhere…but need someone to fuck…haha. Again, this is not a Craigslist add or a desperate cry for someone in my life…. it’s called venting people. I just want to know what YOU think of an adult actress involved in a significant relationship. Is it possible? Could it work? Do you care what others may think of you and your new status?
Keep your response pleasant pretty please 
xoxo LB
October 10th, 2010 at 10:02 pm
Good luck to you. I know it’s possible because other porn ladies have managed to do it. Jenna H. was in a relationship for awhile where she did lez only as a compromise. Speaking of “lez only” I thought you were Bi but mostly gay, no?
October 10th, 2010 at 10:19 pm
Hi Lexi! first of all I want to say that I think you’re really cute and very sexy. I think that everyone needs to love and be loved, even porn stars, I know you’ll find someone who will really love you just the way you are, porn star or not. So, enjoy your single life, real love will come, just wait and be yourself, the sweet, nice, cute, interesting, and hot as hell Lexi Belle. I’d love to be your friend, I think you’re a really nice girl.
October 11th, 2010 at 12:07 pm
hey lexi, i read your post and i’m surprised that no one responded to your blog yet! i just wanted to say that while it’s possible to have a serious relationship, i think at some point within a period of time; the things will get very rough. i don’t speak for every guy out there but for most, it becomes very hard to accept the fact that my girlfriend is having sex with multiple other men out there even though it maybe strictly professional. men are selfish creatures by nature and why should we have to share the person we love with another person? it’s not fair to you or to them. so i think as long as you continue to work in the adult industry you’ll have a hard time finding yourself in a serious relationship. at least one that doesn’t work inside of the industry at least.
October 11th, 2010 at 1:25 pm
Hey
, ye i think its possible for a pronstar to be in a decent loving relationship, it may be my British mentality lol but if you just need to find a guy whp accepts you for who you are, its understandable why a guy would be daunted by the thought of you sleeping with other guys and whether he can compare to them but the love you share should be enough for him to look past that after all its your living. I personally would look past that if i loved the girl enough its justa question of finding a guy whos open about it and not a freak lol hard to find but they are out there 
xx xx
Nice blog
just thought i’d leave a quick message
October 20th, 2010 at 6:01 pm
As someone who stumbled across your Twitter a while back and found you to be funny, charming and engaging, I never expected to ever follow a link to your blog, much less offer a comment, but here it goes, since I do think I have some insight into this: I once dated a girl who worked in “the business” for a short time. And even though I’m one of the more secure/non-jealous guys you could ever meet, and even though I was totally fine hearing about all about the things she did with other men on set, I have to admit, it still crept into my head every now and then. I mean, I cared for her dearly, and I think I worried more about her being used or taken advantage of than I actually did about her having sex with other guys, but it still planted a little bug that infiltrated my quiet moments here and there. But ultimately, the relationship ended for reasons that had nothing to do with her job, and we’re still friends and now she leads a different, “normal” life. So there…
Anyway, the REAL reason I wanted to comment was for something else…to compliment you on your writing. No bullshit, you’re eloquent and do a good job of weaving a story. You write in a very conversational voice, which is a bit of a gift, I think. You should keep doing it…writing is something you only get better at if you keep doing it regularly.
Apples and bananas,
Brett
October 21st, 2010 at 1:55 am
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